Saturday, February 28, 2009

THREE MONTHS WITHOUT YOU NOW...








Three months without your beautiful smile...
Grammie and Paw-Paw miss you so much , Angel.
Hugs and Kisses



Wednesday, February 25, 2009

~Life is too long without you~



~ I wonder how long this can last. Maybe years from now- if the pain would just decrease to the point where I could bear it- I would be able to look back on those few short months that would always be the best of my life. And, if it were possible if the pain would ever soften enough to allow me to do that, I was sure that I would feel grateful for as much time as he had given me. More than I'd deserved. Maybe someday I'd be able to see it that way.~
FROM: NEW MOON

This paragraph from an exquisite trilogy(Twilight)sums up my misery in losing "Beans".
It's coming on 3 months now, that seems like an eternity. But also, feels so raw, that it could have only been a second ago....
I love you "Beans"

Saturday, February 14, 2009

New link for grieving families

Griefhaven has been a great source for conversing with other grieving families for me .

https://www.griefhaven.org

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Happy Valentine's Beans...




How am I ?


Speaking for all of us
The world hasn't stopped turning because we are hurting...
Life goes on all around us as ours feels as though it has come to a halt.
Sometimes people don't realize that asking how you're doing just opens the floodgates.
I want to scream and say I'm not alright and I won't be alright, but I know that will make me sound like a lunatic. But , it's how I feel most days. The days pass slowly and the nights slower , when you've lost a child. You go to sleep hoping it's all a nightmare and wake up wishing it was , only to go through the same day over and over. The constant thoughts of what should have been and what could have been are consuming. Always wanting to snuggle him , watch him sleeping, hear him laughing,watch him enjoy a cookie and thinking of what he would sound like if he could talk...wishing things were different .
To be able to change things for my daughter, his mommy. To have words that would make things better like mom's are supposed to be able to do. I don't have the right words , there are no right words. I don't have the answers, somebody , please , tell me what the answers are!
Wishing the doctor would have given more thought to Elijah than to whatever could have been on his mind that day.
Rage, pain and grief... nothing can change it now.
I MISS ELIJAH CALL

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Elijah Call and Uncle Jacob



One of the best pictures as said by all...
Today has been so hard , Angel, we miss you more than sunshine.
We will not give up searching for your answers.
You are permanently engraved in our hearts, eyes and minds...
Love you more each moment,
FOREVER YOURS
GRAMMIE

Monday, February 9, 2009

Happy Day...

My happy little "Bean baby".

Symptoms of DiGeorge syndrome - WrongDiagnosis.com#symptom_list#symptom_list

 

Symptoms of DiGeorge syndrome - WrongDiagnosis.com#symptom_list#symptom_list

I'll be watching over you...

                                              Love,

                                              Elijah Call

http://www.irisremembers.org/illbewatchingoveryou.html

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Elijah video

40 year old man diagnosed with DiGeorge...

More and more, I am finding information that justifies my thoughts that there NEEDS to be more education in the medical profession about 22q deletions , DiGeorge, and all other genetic disorders. Education IS key. If more doctors understood, more can be done.
Please help me educate them...

http://www.pubmedcentral.nih.gov/articlerender.fcgi?artid=2222674